Category Archives: Humor

Love/Hate the Macbook Air

Let’s face it, we mac users are spoiled.

For years, Apple has created laptops that have been a marvel in both design and engineering. Both the Macbook and Macbook Pro overall have changed little over the years because they are just that well designed.

Even the competition has finally realized that design makes a difference and are putting a little more thought into the look of their machines.

Late last year, the rumors started floating around that Apple may release a subnotebook. Everyone started dreaming up what that could be. A lot of folks wanted Apple to bring back the 12″ Powerbook: a machine with all the power of the MBP in a smaller package.

And, if Apple were any other computer manufacturer, like Dell, HP, or Lenovo, that’s exactly what they would have done.

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Should I Stop?

I suppose this is meant for the married folk out there, but funny for all.

If you’re ever wondering when you should stop playing that game, here’s a nifty flowchart that should help you.

Decision Matrix

Don’t tase me, bro!

Yes, that’s right.

You know your fifteen minutes of fame have started ticking away when:

  1. You interrupt a Q&A session of a politician who is basically irrelevant and demand that your ridiculous questions be answered.
  2. The handlers have you escorted away by police, which only get you all riled up and create a bigger fuss while your buddies capture all of it on camera.
  3. You continue to resist and make an even bigger scene, and then, beg the officers not to use a Taser on your sorry ass. They do anyway, just to shut you up.
  4. Video of the event makes it all over YouTube, and is picked up by all of the major news networks. Yes, even FOX News.
  5. And finally, the epitome of your fame hits: A phrase you utter during all of this is captured…. on a tee shirt.

Yes, that’s right! Act now, and you too can get the “Don’t Tase Me, Bro!” shirts online.

Don’t Tase Me, Bro!

Now, imagine what would have happened to this guy if he had waited until this week and pulled this on Iranian president Amendi, Amaner, Amonalisa… whatever.

But, alas, maybe he can hook up with the “Leave Britney Alone” shemale and they put on a show together.

Still, the tee-shirt is classic!

Even better, the “dick in a box” shirt

Box Shirt

LOL! Clueless, greedy eBayer in Dallas

Oh, man, you have to watch this video…

 greedy ebayer

The story is about a woman who brought along $16k in cash with the plan to buy someone’s place in line at an AT&T store, then buy every iPhone they had in stock. Why? So she could turn around and put them up on eBay, hoping to sell them for outrageous amounts.

What she doesn’t plan on is 1) Apple having plenty on hand, and 2) didn’t make any effort to find out how many the store would actually sell her.

So, the cameras follow her up to the line at 5:45 pm. She offers $800 to the kid at the front of the line who’d been there since 8 am or earlier. She gets in line, and sure enough, she’s the first one in the door. The cameras catch her smug look as she thinks her brilliant plan is about to come to fruition. Then, hilarity ensues when she learns, as everyone else already knew, that she could only buy one phone.

Sadly, they don’t show complete footage of her getting pissed off, but the reporter mentions she was clearly pissed. She was even more pissed at the guy who took her money, who already knew the limit on phones. He got to buy the phone and every accessory he could possibly want.

Kudos to this guy for getting a “free” iPhone and toys out of the deal, and for pissing off the greedy, clueless eBayer who wanted to shaft everyone.

Course, with stories floating that AT&T was forcing people to buy accessories with the iPhone, she probably would have been pissed anyway when she found out she’d have to buy cases for all those phones — depending on how much she had to bribe someone to let her buy more than one phone.

But, if you’re reading this, greedy eBayer, I’ll let you have mine for a mere $1200, with case. : )

Hmm… time to relocate? lol

I just stumbled across this nifty little infographic that shows where the concentrations of single populations are…

singles_2.jpg

Sadly, there appears to be a larger number of single MEN in the DFW area. That might be good news for you single ladies (or those of you playing for the other team – not that there’s anything wrong with that), but not so much for me.

OMG!!! Why aren’t there more women that think like this?

I stumbled across this on Digg tonight. And although she takes a few points to the extreme (for me it’s Diet Coke cans, not Mountain Dew lol), she does have some valid points.

Why Geeks and Nerds Are Worth It 

It doesn’t necessarily mean that all geeks/nerds are rejected outright by women. But, they may have a harder time (never got comfortable around women) or have spent a lot of time more focused on a career and relationships weren’t nearly as important. There’s a huge difference between a geek with a career, someone closer to the 40-year-old virgin, and that guy who is living in his parents basement.
And, for the record – Geeks are the ones who are naturally technically inclined, etc. Nerds are average guys who aspire to be geeks.

It’s really a shame that more women don’t think like the above writer, especially here in North Texas. It seems like there are far too many women here who are more interested in how much a guy makes, what kind of car he drives, and when was the last time he appeared in GQ.

So, here’s my million dollar idea of the week (I don’t want credit – just send me the check)

Geeklove.com – or something along those lines – a place where women can find any number of single geeks, and where geeks can post their profiles without having to feel ashamed about their accomplishments (go ahead and brag about the number of level 70 characters you have in WoW — maybe you can find a girlfriend here and get her hooked on the game too!)

Maybe we should have a “Have you hugged a geek?” day?

Because, really, where can a geeky person find someone? The online dating world would seem like an ideal place. But, it’s become such a big business now that more non-geeky people are dwelling there. So, you could try that arena, but you might have to omit certain details about your life (which is ok, because recent articles show that a LOT of people tend to fudge their online profiles – that’s another post).

Clubs? Bars? Ugh. Does anyone really know someone that has found true love at a club? What about the speed dating thing? Or, even the social dinner? Speed dating seems silly to me. The social dinner concept appears interesting. An organization hosts a dinner for a small group (6-12 people) who they have done some profiling on in order to establish a group with some common ground. But, if a true geek doesn’t have the social skills, he’s probably going to end up quietly sitting in a corner.

If you looking for ideas on what to do, I’m as stumped as the rest of you. I’m probably more geeky than I’d like to admit. But, there’s nothing WRONG with me. I have job, and a home (mine, not my parents), and friends. Although I can’t quote Shakespeare to you in the original Klingon, I do have a lot of geeky traits. At the same time, I’m also an artist and writer. And an uncle. I do have a life, more or less.  : )

I really haven’t the foggiest idea where to start when it comes to dating these days. My luck has been beyond horrible, which just makes me push the whole relationship thing further and further down on ‘the list’ of stuff I’d like to get done. I tried the “it’ll happen when you aren’t looking” approach as well, but strangely, UPS never delivered that dream girl to my door.
Yet, at the same time, every year there are stories that come out about how marriages are down and that there are more and more single people out there in the world. If there are so many single people out there, why is it so hard now to find them?

I recently picked up a CD called Love. It’s a collection of Beatles songs that have been ‘tweaked’ by George Martin – a legendary producer who once worked with them. One of the songs on the CD is “Elanor Rigby,” and it’s funny how a song from nearly 40 years ago still rings true today…

What is the internet good for?

Heh, this is a bit old, but if you haven’t seen it, you really have to. : )

Internet is for porn (no it’s not actually porn – trust me, it’s funny)

Mac vs. PC – religious parody

Nope nope, not what you think. There’s no mac zealot vs windows fanboy ad here. But these are kinda funny anyway.

Christian vs. Christ Follower

Normally, I wouldn’t post anything religious on my blog, but these are fun today because I think it portrays a lot of the things that are wrong with “Christians” today. I know a few people who are like this: they’re more interested in convincing you that they’re “Christian” by making a great effort in showing off how they go through the motions and with their holier-than-thou attitude, when the reality is they’re not any better than anyone else (usually, they’re worse).

Ironically, the “christians” will probably be offended by these videos. Why aren’t we the cool “mac” guy? Why are we the geeky “PC” guy? It should be the other way around, they’ll say. They should be the “cool” ones because they’re Christians, while the rest of us heathens should be the “geeky” losers.
But, where are the truly fun “Mac” vs. “PC” religious ads? Like “bible-thumper” vs “athiest”, “palestinian” vs “jew”, or “american” vs “muslim terrorist”? Or, for you really hard-core folks, what about the mother of all religious battles: “coke” vs. “pepsi”?

Ahhhh! A snowflake!!!! EVERYBODY PANIC!!!

Yes, that’s right. North Texas is experiencing the first winter storm of the season.

How crazy is it? Well, it was 79 degrees yesterday. Today, the high was 35. And that was at 4 am. It’s been dropping since.

Plus, we’ve got sleet and a bit of snow. But, that was after the rain overnight.

Ice transforms all of the overpasses and ramps here into new arenas of fun for Texas drivers. And we have a LOT of overpasses and ramps.

Unlike most parts of the country, we usually stay warm enough most of the year that we miss out on snow entirely. Instead, we get sleet/ice storms. At least on pure snow, you can get some traction. On ice, it doesn’t matter what kind of drive you have, it’s spin city for everyone.

It’s interesting to watch the local news around this time too. A couple of fox 4 reporters probably needed a change of pants after recording a truck losing control on a highway at around 5 a.m. this morning. In the video, we see the truck hit the brakes and swerve to miss two other trucks previously wrecked, only to skid directly towards the cameraman. Fortunately for them, there was a guard rail and it held, so we see the truck catch the rail and slide down just to the left of the cameraman.

On the way home this afternoon the high five exchange was already shut down on one side from a multiple vehicle pile up. There will probably be some footage on tonight or in the morning of people trying to use the ramps on the high five or 190 exchanges only to discover they’re coated in ice. For those of you that have never seen our interchanges, the ones I am referring two link between two major highways, with two or more layers of bridges and ramps towering up to 100 ft above the lowest level.

The scariest part of driving in it isn’t the ice itself. It’s the other drivers. Sadly, most Texas drivers don’t encounter ice often enough to remember how to drive on it. A lot of them simply ignore it and drive as fast as they would on a normal day. Others believe their 4-wheel drive vehicles are impervious to any forms of harm and drive the same. But equally dangerous are the few who go the complete opposite way and crusie down a left lane of a major freeway going 15 mph when its clearly not warranted to drive quite that slow.

Fortunately, we only have to endure the ice tomorrow morning (it’ll be a good day to go in late to work). Tomorrow’s forecast? Sunny and 49 degrees, which should be good enough to melt all the crap from today. : )

Episode III: A Lost Hope

Sadly, this trailer might be better than the actual movie…

Star Wars Trailer

After seeing the last two Star Wars movies, I’m not optimistic that this one will be much better. In spite of the fact that the Clone Wars happen, Vader is born, and a lot of Jedi are supposed to die, I worry that somehow Lucas is going to try to spin a happy ending out of all of this.

Don’t get me wrong. I think the Star Wars is a great fictional concept, and I think Lucas is amazing at creating these worlds. He just has a problem with telling the story.

There are rumors, as usual, going around that Lucas may actually let the next three movies get made. He isn’t interested in doing them, but he might turn them over to the right person.

To me, the ‘dream team’ for that job would be to get Joss Whedon to write the screenplays and let Spielberg direct them. Whedon is the main creator of “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” and “Angel,” and I think he would breathe some life into the Star Wars characters.

If you’re not convinced that Spielberg could do great things with Star Wars, then go rent The Terminal. To me, this was a movie with a very very weak concept, but somehow Spielberg managed to make it into a decent flick. I think he’s also made one or two other pretty decent movies…. : )